You Say Yes, I Say No

There are at least two things that Indians do that would be considered very rude by Westerners who come to India for the first time.

One is that Indians are always interrupting. Whether it’s cutting in front of you in line at a store or interjecting their completely unrelated thoughts into a private conversation, they do not hesitate to put themselves before others. Their needs and their thoughts always come first, and that’s okay.

The other thing is that Indians always nod and say yes. All the time. Especially when they don’t understand you.

“Shammi, can you purchase more eggs? There are no eggs in the mud hut.” (Notice the use of simple words that are easy to understand)

“Ha, yes, okay.”

“You understand?”

“Ha, eggs, yeah.”

Don’t expect eggs anytime soon.

This is the case with every single Indian I have met. No exception. They always nod and say yes and agree with you, even if they don’t have a clue what you are saying. It’s very easy to get confused. The trick is to just assume that don’t actually understand you, regardless of what they say.

I asked Principal Ramdev what he thought about that and where it might come from. His opinion is that it stems from primary education in India. Whenever you are asked a question in school, you are always expected to have the right answer. “I don’t know” is not acceptable. So if a teacher is doing a lecture and asks if you understand the material, Indians instinctively respond in the affirmative for fear of being reprimanded. I know that at least in my education, I was encouraged to speak up if I didn’t understand what I was learning, if I wanted it made clearer. That just isn’t the case here.

When you go to India, just assume that “yes” means “no.” It will make life easier.